Order and Shipping 
We offer nationwide delivery within 2 working days for £4 per carton. 
Subscribe and get free freight for life. Cancel at any time.

Can I change my subscription? 

You can indeed. Just log in to your smartass account and you can manage your subscription there, too easy. 

Will TP breakdown in a Septic Tank? 
Absolutely! smartass is made from 100% sugarcane and bamboo fibre, as these fibres are shorter than timber, it will breakdown faster.

What’s up with the wraps? 
Since we sell directly to you via our website, we use recycled cardboard for our boxes and wrap the TP in our lovely smartass wraps, rather than plastic!

Where is smartass made? 
Our products are made in China. We visit our partners regularly, and we're proud to work with the best in the business.

Why couldn’t the toilet paper cross the road? It got stuck in the crack!